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from Books & Reviews
Book Review
Growth into Manhood:
Resuming the Journey
by Alan Medinger
Reviewed by Gregory Dickson, Ph.D.
"Can a 30-, 40- or 50-year-old man go back and retrace
his steps? Can you go back and live your childhood all over again--doing
it "right" this time?" asks author Alan Medinger. Religious faith will
provide support for the process, but more yet will be required of a man,
he says, because "God does not heal our immaturity."
Alan Medinger offers direction, challenge, and encouragement to men who
desire to grow beyond unwanted homoerotic attractions in his new book,
Growth Into Manhood. Written in a straightforward, reader-friendly
manner, Medinger's work promotes a deeper understanding of male
homosexuality along with practical suggestions to guide the reader as he
"resumes the journey" toward a full embrace of his true masculine
identity.
"A man growing into manhood does not do it alone," the book explains.
"He needs encouragers, models, and friends." These words set the tone
for the pages that follow.
Alan Medinger is one of the best-known and respected leaders in
Christian ministry to homosexual strugglers. In addition to sharing his
own personal experiences, he describes the circumstances so commonly
reported by the other men he has counseled: a struggle with
self-identity, and a resulting failure to achieve a stable, internal
sense of equality with one's peers. He illustrates some of the ways in
which the symptoms may be manifested in adulthood, while clarifying that
this is an individual process which differs with each man.
Medinger's observations are congruent with the clinical experience of
most reorientation therapists. In order to be effective, therapy must
rely on understanding how the individual boy (and later man) has
interpreted and acted upon the circumstances he experienced during his
developmental years. Even though each individual's experience and
healing process is undoubtedly unique, we see many of the same patterns:
the tendency to doubt self, and to fear failure and the rejection of
others; the development of a passive approach to life, with the
acquisition of various self-defeating behaviors. All of the above fall
within a broad cluster of commonly noted symptoms.
While the author does not directly focus on a discussion of
psychological dynamics, the clinician reading this work will easily note
the underlying psychological themes related to separation/individuation,
core beliefs, unconscious defenses, unresolved anger, failure to develop
an internal locus of control, and the development of a false/adaptive
self.
Medinger describes a double-binding, self-defeating situation. The
developing boy has an inherent need to grow into a cohesive sense of
adult masculinity. However due to his developmental experiences--which
most often include difficulty in detaching from mother, attaching to
father, and joining his peers as an equal--he may then reject that which
he most fervently wants and needs. The resulting sense of frustration
often leads to a perpetually diminished sense of confidence, personal
power, and peer connection, along with yet a greater striving to escape
that bind. And so the boy compensates through same-sex attraction.
The author provides a straightforward challenge to men who have gone, as
he dubs it, "AWOL" from the journey toward manhood. He emphasizes the
importance of an internal motivation toward maturity, rather than one
which may be dictated by society--either by those with an
anti-homosexual agenda, or by those who relay a politically correct
message that says his gender confusion is part of his authentic
identity.
Medinger's incorporation of his personal conversion experience and
Christian faith into the message may limit the book's appeal to those
who do not share similar beliefs or who have not had a similar
life-changing experience. However the discerning reader, regardless of
personal spiritual posture, will likely glean helpful information and
therapeutic insight from this insightful resource.
Growth into Manhood is published by WaterBrook Press for a price of
$12.99 softcover, and can be ordered through Regeneration Ministries
(telephone 410-661-0284).
Updated: 3 September 2008
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